Hey, fellow truckers! Today I\u2019ve got a warning for you about the Halloween nightmares lurking around your tippers.
I\u2019m not joking, this is a really serious matter. An encounter with Halloween ghouls like these could end up being worse than an unwanted spin round a bend!
So, my friends, keep your nerves in check, avoid routine, rushing and recklessness, and watch out for those dreadful creatures!
But first, a rather grim industry joke:
Why are skeletons such excellent car mechanics? Because they have a wealth of experience in falling apart from the inside. <\/p>
Let\u2019s start with Gnuck the Absent-Minded. He\u2019s a monster who causes the loader operator to suddenly become distracted.
He loads the material wherever he fancies, and on your tipper lorry everything\u2019s a mess and the material looks like a range of the Carpathians.
When unloading, it\u2019s easy to tip the whole load over! Gnucek is delighted because he\u2019s got the chance to tease the driver and really get under his skin.
So always make sure that the loader operator isn\u2019t possessed by that Scatterbrained Gnuck and has distributed the material symmetrically in the tipper. <\/p>
Next on the list is the Malicious Mud Drowning Woman. An encounter with her is a real disaster! The rig loses its stability, the tipper sinks into the ground, and this leads to a catastrophic overturn.
But you can get round it \u2013 you just need to check that the ground is stable. <\/p>
Now it\u2019s time for the Sloping-Steep Gnome. Whenever he appears, your tipper is always on uneven ground or trying to climb a hill.
This ends badly, because the tipper often ends up on its side. That little imp makes your job even harder than usual!
You\u2019ve got to check the tilt when unloading; otherwise, you\u2019ll annoy him and he\u2019ll run off. <\/p>
Another nightmare is the Non-Rectilinear Krzywica Witch. Her presence means that your horse and trailer combination is always lopsided and loses stability whilst being unloaded.
As soon as you see or feel it, it\u2019s better to hold back and take it easy than to try to let off steam. <\/p>
Now, the Jado-Voltovy Arachnid. When you encounter it, all you\u2019ll see is a flash, followed by darkness. This arachnid shows no mercy, and its web takes a grim toll.
You\u2019ll need to keep your eyes peeled to avoid his schemes. <\/p>
And now, the Hysterical Shaker Ghost. This ghost stops the load from sliding off your tipper, whilst driving you completely mad.
You treat the tipper\u2019s body like a cocktail shaker. It\u2019s better to think than to tussle with it, otherwise you might get oil right in your face! <\/p>
Next up is the \u2018Clear-Opening, Narrow-Opening\u2019 Strzyga. This nightmare lives in your load bed and causes the load to get stuck in the tailgate or the tipper doors.
When it strikes, you\u2019d be better off grabbing a spade rather than trying to shovel it. <\/p>
And now, Old Man Erekcjusz the Malicious. This old man makes sure your tipper is always raised, as if you were trying to clear bridges or sail.
Erekcjusz causes things to stand upright until it all goes pear-shaped \u2013 that is, until it collapses. Avoid him by checking several times what\u2019s happening with the tipper if you want to carry on driving! <\/p>
Last but not least, we have the Poor Old Sclerotic. This monster makes you want to have a bit of a go. Heat the oil in the hydraulics and grind the gears in the pump, PTO or gearbox.
PTO can cause you to lose track of things and may lead to a culinary disaster in your vehicle. You must be vigilant and use a control unit with a PTO-engaged indicator, or a control system that automatically disengages the PTO when the hopper is lowered. <\/p>
Last on the list is the Pressure-Swollen She-Wolf. This she-wolf tempts you to tamper with the pressure in the hydraulic system, which could result in a catastrophic explosion \u2013 for example, of a cylinder.
To fool it, you must use only the best components from trusted suppliers, otherwise you\u2019ll end up with oil gushing everywhere and a pile of components to send to the scrapyard. <\/p>
So, my dear operators and drivers, don\u2019t let the Halloween horrors get the better of you on your routes.
Keep your nerves in check, be careful and make sure you get home safely \u2013 because only then will you be able to laugh at these horror stories about terrifying adventures on the road!
I\u2019m warning you, these monsters certainly won\u2019t help you get any sweets \u2013 they\u2019ll just play a trick on you.
Well then, see you next Monday. Stay with me \u2013 your Witch, Joanna Pieprzyca.<\/p>